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Life has changed

I never thought I'd be a mother. Hell, I never thought I'd get married! Here I am. Here we are. This shit is hard and it's so wonderful and it fills me up to the brim. Sometimes that feels exactly right and other times it feels like I'm lost. I'm 38. I've never cared much about getting older but I think having kids starts a clock, a new one. How much time do I have left with these beautiful human beings we just created? How much time do I get to see their faces and hold their hands and kiss them and play with them? Raising children seems like it will be the most important thing I will ever do in my life. I understand why people say that now. And yet, I also feel lost in the abyss of motherhood and long for my body back, my space, my thoughts, my career and my relationship with my husband back. This thing called motherhood/parenthood is not for the weak. We'll make it, whatever IT is, all of us. We'll be ok. It doesn't always feel like we'll be o…
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2007 Flashback: Remember who you are

September 14, 2007 - Friday

The Most Amazing Experience!
Current mood: triumphant
I went on as Katherine in The Taming of the Shrew at the Shakespeare Theatre tonight!!!

Charlayne was injured in last night's show. She is a trooper and she finished the show anyway WITH an injury. I had no question in my mind that she'd go on the next day. We hadn't had understudy rehearsals yet and I wasn't off book. But her work ethic suggested to me that even if she was headless, she'd perform. So naturally, foolishly, I didn't look at Kate's lines.

What happens next? Her doctors tell her she shouldn't/can't perform. Oh boy.

I was hoping that it wouldn't be until after Opening Night that I'd have to REALLY know Kate's lines. I didn't have that much text left to memorize, but I was taking my sweet time. Mistake, yes, but I was more prepared than I thought. The play is about her but she surprisingly doesn't say too much. Petruchio talks more th…